At the Emergency Room

I held Sharon’s hand all through the ambulance drive, and didn’t let go until we arrived at the hospital. Sharon crying softly throughout it all. Me, staying strong for her sake. They wheeled her into the emergency room, while I stayed in the waiting area. The last place I wanted to be was in a hospital, but I wasn’t going to leave until I knew she was going to be ok. I must have looked like a crazy person….my hair looked a mess from when Regina pulled out my extensions. My make-up was smeared, I’m sure. Oh, the morning had started out so well, with me getting all dolled up to finally see Dandy and the bakery shoppe….and in less than an hour…I don’t know, the world turned upside down. That fucking bitch Regina! I just didn’t see how the day could get any worse. And then I saw a couple of uniformed policemen walking towards me. Oh shit…

I was so scared, but they were real polite, and just wanted to hear my side of the story…asking questions if they needed more details. They even called me “Ma’am!” Me! All during their questioning, I was screaming inside….”You stupid idiots…can’t you see that I’m the one that saved her. Why aren’t you going after her WACKO NURSE…THAT HATEFUL PIECE OF TRASH, REGINA! IF I HAD MY HANDS ON HER I’D FUCKNG KILL THE PYSCHO BITCH! WHY DO YOU GO AFTER HER INSTEAD OF ASKING ME ALL THESE STUPID QUESTIONS, YOU MORONS!?” But I sat quietly answering their questions, popping in few “yes sirs” and “no sirs.” Well, they seemed satisfied, but they were going to send in a specialist to question Sharon to confirm my story. I’m was sure they were also going to look up to see if I had any priors, so I just blurted out “I gotta record…for soliciting, twice. Just in case you need to know, but I don’t do that no more.” I didn’t mention that I still worked at clubs like the “Twisted Kitty” and “Bootsie’s Big Bang Bonanza.” Hey, it’s decent paying work. Anyways, they made a note, nodded and then walked away.

I sat there for a long time, studying the runs in my pantyhose. There was the whole history of the morning in them. This one from fighting with Regina...this one from loosening Sharon’s shackles, and this one happened in the ambulance. A brand new pair wrecked. Finally, the doctor or somebody…I don’t know who…came to tell me that Sharon was going to be fine, but that they were going to keep her overnight to make sure. And that I should go home. So I asked if I could see her.

The walk through the emergency room was really freaky. They was so old guy screaming and cussing at a nurse, threatening to leave if he didn’t see a doctor right away…now. I mean, I got a potty mouth, but this fella even made me blush. But we finally got to Sharon, and she’s looking good, and smiling and calling out to me, and I guess she was so excited that she used her entire vocabulary at once….”FRIEND-JUST-LOVE-PENIS-HELP-EAT IT!” well, the nurse just look bug-eyed, but I wasn’t embarrassed. I went over and hugged my friend, my Sharon. And just as I was about let go, she chirped out “cupcake!” I mean, what the fuck?!” Did she leave that cupcake? Did she see who did? I said, “Sharon, what do you mean by that?” But the nurse interrupted us to tell they had to take Sharon’s to get some x-rays. So, I said goodbye and called an Uber to get home.

I was really surprised that I spent the entire day in the hospital. The sun was setting, and everything looked rosy and golden. Even though it was an absolutely gorgeous sunset, I just wanted to get out of these damn clothes, and take a long hot shower. I’ll bet Bette Davis never had a day like this, and if she did…well, she’d say something classy and witty while wearing some incredible gown by IRENE. And not some dirty and wrinkled Donna Karan knockoff. No, that Bette Davis, she could do anything…kill you just as easily with a glance as with a gun. Yeah, seems like she either had a drink or a cigarette (or both) in her hand!

Anyway, I get to my place…and there on my doorstep is another god dammed, but wonderful, unfrosted-chocolate-cupcake- muffin with another red rose. But I look further, and there’s a small card. And written with very nice penmanship is the following message:

“Are you afraid of getting burnt if you get too close to happiness?”