We are such Stuff as Dreams are Made on

I’m finding that I’m having trouble planning and day-dreaming lately. No, not lately….since March. And I have to admit it’s because of the pandemic. I took an inventory of my hobbies, and I realized that my favorite activities (working out at the gym, acting/directing theatrical productions, singing at open mic, dining with friends – I LOVE sushi!) all involve being around people. And, of course, all of those joys have been closed down during this crisis.

I normally work out three times a week for an hour with my trainer (who pushes as though I were?/was? a 25 year old – OY!). And I’m usually prepping for my next theatrical production, either memorizing lines, researching, or rehearsing/performing. The production of THE PRODUCERS, in which I was performing, was placed on hold after only one performance in mid-March. It’s slated to reopen a year later in March of 2021…hopefully, but who can tell with the world all topsy turvy. And, when I’m not working on my next production, I like to croak out a few tunes at Frankie’s open mic on a Thursday night.

All of that suddenly evaporated. And, to honest, I thought I’d be handling it better.

I’ve always prided myself on being able to work around obstacles. But this pandemic has me stumped; I think it’s because we simply don’t know when the damn thing is going to be over. And based upon our citizens’ inability (as a whole) to consistently social distance, we are going to have to wait until there’s a vaccine. And it’s become VERY political, which is just making everything even worse.

I used to have this daydream – really something to help me fall asleep. Rather than counting sheep (which never worked for me), I’d envision a large, empty windowless room – a place in which I’d live for a year, without any sense of time. So, no clocks, no internet, not cell phones. I’d envision everything I’d place in the room to help me pass the time (sanely!) during the year. I’d have a home gym, a cardio machine, a large widescreen television with a variety of movies, some blank journals (to fill), a computer (without internet), jigsaw puzzles etc. While weighing the pros and cons of certain furnishings, I’d nod off to sleep.

Well, damn it, I’ve currently living in a variation of that scenario during this pandemic…and I have so much more to help me pass the time. I have the internet. I’m able to run errands. I have contact with my friends. So many things! And yet, I’m so unfocused (and unmotivated) during this time. I think it’s because we don’t know how long this will be going on. Whenever, I’ve had to memorize a script (the unglamorous part of being an actor), I divide the script in 2-3 page sections, and learn a section each day so I’d be off-book by a certain date. But what do you do when you don’t have a deadline, because you don’t know when you’ll even begin rehearsal? You get lazy (well, I, Me, Myself), and put it off until tomorrow, and tomorrow and tomorrow…

So, what am I doing to give myself some structure and purpose?

I’m helping Desert Rose Playhouse get settled in their new performance space, the old Zelda’s nightclub in downtown Palm Springs. I’ll chat about that in some later blog entries. Stay tuned…it’s quite an undertaking!